Pitchfork Reviews: Noticed: Overhauled

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Pitchfork thought about it and decided to change his mind about some things. The music blog famous for its meticulously decimal reviews has gone back and reassessed 19 scores they have already given to albums over the years.

Covering everyone from Regina Spektor to Chief Keef, the new scores are “born of conversations” that Pitchfork staff have “all the time” and, it is noted in bold, “not hot.” The real question is: how “good” are these reclassified reviews? I’m not a music critic, but I also like to give a work a somewhat arbitrary numerical value based on my personal whims, so here are my own notes of the 10 Pitchfork reviews that spoke to me the most.

Wilco: sky blue sky

Original rating: 5.2

Revised score: 8.5

Olivia’s score of this Rescore: 2.6

Once a friend took me to a Wilco show and I only saw one other woman there whose complexion could not be described as alabaster. Pitchfork calls them “one of the most daring bands in rock,” but I wasn’t having fun so I think this album probably doesn’t deserve an 8.5. I think their initial rating of 5.2 (which I give 8.9) was very good.

Chief Keef: Back from the dead

Original rating: 7.9

Revised rating: 9.1

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 7.3

Chief Keef is literally ten days older than me, so it was really cool that he released music like this when we were both 17 years old. I support him in all his efforts, but like Pitchfork, I agree that he made better music later. On the other hand, it was the mixtape that gave us “I don’t like”, so maybe it should get a 10.

Regina Spektor: Start to hope

Original rating: 7.5

Revised score: 8.5

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 9.1

Shout out to all the girls who dressed like they lived in London while spending endless hours browsing Tumblr for keeping this album alive over the years. This one was definitely for you, and you deserve this very slight upgrade from the music authorities.

Chairlift: Butterfly

Original rating: 7.6

Revised score: 8.5

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 0.9

My score reflects both the actual numerical difference between the two Pitchfork scores and how unnecessary it is to include such a small increase on their roster. Has it improved by less than a point? Thanks for clarifying. Maybe leave this one in the Slack channel and stop wasting Caroline Polachek’s time.

Shots : Room on fire

Original rating: 8.0

Revised rating: 9.2

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 4.7

We as a culture don’t need to give Julian Casablancas more than he already has.

Lana del Rey: Born to die

Original rating: 5.5

Revised score: 7.8

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 6.3

Much like Chief Keef, Lana’s debut album was huge for me in high school, so I’ll always say it’s the best thing I’ve ever heard in my life. That being said, I can’t help but notice that they gave it a 7.8, just a tenth of a point higher than what the artist said. Shamir called “The essential gay eavesdropping bat signal.” Could it be a coincidence? Maybe, but they lose points for their impertinence.

Charli XCX: Vroum Vroum

Original rating: 4.5

Revised score: 7.8

Olivia’s score of this Rescore: 3.5

Okay, this is no coincidence.

Daft Punk: Discovery

Original rating: 6.4

Revised rating: 10

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 7.9

I’m not a fan of electronic music or saying that any work of art is perfect, but I appreciate the common sense shown here. Discovery is one of those albums that is, like, your favorite artist’s favorite album, and you can’t really overstate the impact it has had and continues to have. Or I guess you can, and they did.

Grimes: Miss Anthropocene

Original score: 8.2

Revised score: 6.9

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 6.3

Are they right in saying this album ain’t as good as, say, Angels of art? Yes. Do I think they’re trying to make Grimes notice by giving him what is essentially a 69? Yes. She loves math jokes. Points deducted once again for effrontery. “Delete Forever” is always a great song.

Liz Phair: Liz Phair

Original rating: 0.0

Revised rating: 6.0

Olivia’s score for this Rescore: 8.2

Justice has been served, but was it enough?



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